THE THRONE: Primetime

The Throne - "Primetime"
(Watch The Throne; 2011)

'Watch The Throne' is a failure of epic proportions, hybridizing the most annoying qualities of Jay-Z's last two full-length solo efforts. The perfect storm of unimaginative concepts and dismal production. Instances where the Caten Brothers climb down from their royal recliners to offer substance come off as a forced effort to pacify critics. Much of the record is comprised of mindless rich nigga rhetoric, which would be perfectly acceptable if the music wasn't devoid of grandiose delusions, farcical humor, and just straight up great rapping.

Spike Jonze's decision to place Aziz Ansari in the 'Otis' video is emblematic of the album's shortcomings. Sure, the casting choice initially struck me as thoroughly stuntastic, until I remembered he's literally the shittiest stand-up comic of all-time (I'd have preferred to see Bill Burr chauffeuring the Rav4). Similarly, my anticipation for 'Watch The Throne' was through the asbestos until I remembered Kanye has never had particularly great vocal chemistry with Big Brother, and this current incarnation of Big Brother is barely even a serviceable rapper. I walked away from this cosmic clusterfuck with the impression Kanye should go away for a while and return when he has something to say, and perhaps Shawn should hang it up entirely.


Oddly enough the project's most impressive song isn't even on the album, but rather packaged as a bonus track. 'Primetime' is exactly what I wanted to hear out of a collaboration between two of the most successful artists in the history of the genre. Uncompromising scrunch face rap sure to have your face wrinkled like a Chinese Shar-Pei. Had there been a dozen more songs of this caliber anchored by a handful of obligatory radio jingles, I might have actually considered glancing at the throne.

12 comments:

  1. 'Watch The Throne' is a failure of epic proportions, hybridizing the most annoying qualities of Jay-Z's last two full-length solo efforts. The perfect storm of unimaginative concepts and dismal production
    ^^^^
    Surgical precision

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well said. Esp. this part:

    "Much of the record is comprised of mindless rich nigga rhetoric, which would be perfectly acceptable if the music wasn't devoid of grandiose delusions, farcical humor, and just straight up great rapping."

    I'll forgive Robb Report rap any day if it's fun. This was like reading the auction catalogue of Christie's.

    ReplyDelete
  3. 'Primetime' is exactly what I wanted to hear out of a collaboration between two of the most successful artists in the history of the genre
    ^^^

    emphatic co-sign

    ReplyDelete
  4. Really? That big of a failure? Im not saying it knocked me off my feet by no means, but it sounds more or less how i expected. I think it was just plain silly of anyone to get there hopes up for some epic record to come out of this collaboration. If you did let that little spark burn in your mind long enough to get gassed on the hype machine then there may be a bigger underlying issue for you as a fan/individual. Rational is what it comes down to. These two are clearly to far gone down the rabbit hole of limitless luxury to have any frame of reference on what it is to be the average joe (black or white) in a society that is on life support and consuming itself from the inside out. Thats the biggest concern here. If two dudes that are on that socioeconomic level are able to see any semblance of a problem with the system as it stands then that should be a big slap in the face for all of us little 9-to-5 peons to wake up and say "fuck this, why you complaining? Matter fact, why am i complaining? I need to do something." Sure, i wanted reasonable doubt to meet late registration but that shit is over and done. Its time to quit lamenting about the golden years of the 90's and the flashy mid 00's and start building the new using the pieces of those great years that we have all come to respect and infusing it with the creativity of the now.

    -Z

    ReplyDelete
  5. until I remembered he's literally the shittiest stand-up comic of all-time
    ^^^

    roff. I thought we were still giving Dane Cook that crown tho?

    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought the album was decent and had good rapping overall [if disappointing still], but this was a really good write up.

    For what it's worth, the two best songs on the album IMO were The Joy and New Day, and those were in fact two of the less "ambitious" tracks on the record. Had they made Watch the Throne an EP with 5-7 songs like that it would be pretty awesome. Buuut, I can't blame them for trying to make a grander record.

    MBDTF>>WTT>BP3 if we're to compare their recent efforts.

    ReplyDelete
  7. @RNC One thing we can agree on is that MBDTF is a superior album. I think the strong half of that record is better than almost everything on BP3 and WTT.

    ReplyDelete
  8. "Spike Jonze's decision to place Aziz Ansari in the 'Otis' video is emblematic of the album's shortcomings...until I remembered he's literally the shittiest stand-up comic of all-time"

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    The homie hl doesn't care about brown people.

    daps anyway and good to see you're still going strong. I meanwhile have risen to a level of corporate mediocrity that forces me to work 12 - 14 hour days.

    ReplyDelete
  9. This review got me laughin'. definitely some valid points though.

    ReplyDelete
  10. @7G Appreciate that. Glad you enjoyed it.

    ReplyDelete